Mornings...

I used to be a morning person, I swear!  But, something happened...and now I am so NOT.  I found this travel coffee mug last summer at Disney World and it screamed at me.  I use it almost everyday now.

Jackie even wrote me a song about my mornings.  I wish I had the audio of her singing it, but here are the words...

Mornings aren't magical.  Mornings aren't magical.

You have to get up so early.

And it's so annoying cause you know what I'm gonna say...

Mornings aren't magical!

For those of you who can relate, I hope you enjoy & know there are other non-morning folks suffering right along beside you!

A Little Laugh...

Yesterday Jackie had a stomach bug & was in bed sick all day.  She had trouble keeping food down so everywhere she went she took a bucket with her.

As the girls were going to bed last night, Jackie was feeling much better but kept her bucket by the bed, just in case.  Josie started complaining that her tummy wasn't feeling well either.  I wasn't sure if she had gotten the bug Jackie had or if she was just saying it for attention.  So, I gave her a bucket of her own, but reminded her that if she got sick she wouldn't get to do anything fun over the weekend.  I figured that would determine if she was really feeling bad or not. 

A couple minutes later I walked past the girls' room & Josie said "Momma, I don't need this bucket anymore.  My tummy stopped hurting."  I smiled & said, "Are you sure?  You can keep it here, just in case."  I knew my little trick of withholding fun had worked on her faking a stomach ache.  She said "No, really, my tummy stopped hurting.  I just needed to toot."  Then that beautiful little thing flashed the cutest smile & I couldn't stop laughing.

Just Be Happy Now...

Facebook status of a college friend:

Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.

I will tell you that this is something I have truly embraced in recent years & I encourage everyone to do the same!  Life is too short......

My House

I love our house.  It's not new or fancy or huge.  But it's my J5 House.  And before it was our house, it was the house of the family who built it in 1978 & raised their family here.  I looked at this house with my mother-in-law, brother-in-law & a 18 month old Jackie Sue while pregnant with Josie.  Joel was working the day we went out with the realtor & when we stepped into this house, the sellers were just on their way out.  They met us & we learned that they were teachers moving to Virginia to be closer to their grown children & grandson who happened to be Jackie's age.  They also let our realtor know that while it was not yet reflected in the system, they had just spoken to their agent that morning and lowered their asking price on the home.  After seeing many homes that day, it was this one & one other that I wanted to show Joel. 

We put an offer in on our house the next morning & over the phone with their realtor the sellers accepted our offer.  Before they were able to meet & sign the paperwork, another offer came in & refelected the higher asking price.  They legally were able to take either offer.  Which one would YOU take?  The one that was $20,000 more?  Or the one that was from the adorable family of the teacher with kids the same age as your grandchildren?   As luck would have it, they picked us. 

On the day of the inspection Mrs. H. took me around the house and told me when she planted each tree & bush, what kind they were, how to care for them, etc.  They took us through the house & showed us everything we needed to know about the house.  We're very proud they picked us to raise our family in their house. 

Here were are 6 1/2 years later & many things in the house have changed.  We replaced the carpet in the family room, Joel finished the rest of the basement into 2 extra rooms--an office for me & a playroom for the children, Joel gutted our masterbath and tiled the whole room, we knocked out a wall between the dining room & kitchen to create one large kitchen area and Joel built a playset in the backyard.  Just last month we hired someone to cut down one of Mrs. H's trees that had grown in a way that threatened the neighbor's roof. 

The day the guys came to cut down the tree, I wondered outloud how in the WORLD they would be able to get the top branches down without dropping them on my house.  Josie watched out her bedroom window, just feet from the tree & said "Momma, if they drop the tree on the house, I'll let you know."  Thanks.:)

I just love our house.  And I love all the people who are in it...

Bless & Release

Jackie couldn't be any sweeter if she tried.  Now I say this with a smile because she certainly has her days where she tries my patience--behaving like I would expect her to behave when she's 16, but overall, she's just one heck of a girl.  So, yesterday my girl had a bad day at school.  For whatever reason, tho she IS Daddy's girl, Joel just irritates her at times like this & she finds it really difficult to be serious with him, so she asked to talk to me.

According to my 8 year old, her friends were being really "nasty" to her at school.  The school has "wizard wows" which are rewards for being good & you can use the little coupons each Wednesday to purchase things off the "Wizard Wow" cart.  My girl, being 8 in a 40 yr old body, has chosen to save her wizard wows for something big, like lunch with her teacher or the principal and she has not purchased ONE thing all year so far.  Yesterday, the girls in class saw her pile and started accusing her of stealing other people's wizard wows.  And, according to Jackie, they wouldn't believe her that she'd just saved them all year, calling her a liar.  When I asked her how that made her feel, she rolled her eyes and said, "Mom!  How would it make YOU feel?"  Well, duh. 

Anyway, we spent some time just talking about this and I gave her a few suggestions--tho she didn't like the one where I offered to just come sit next to her at school for the rest of the year.  In the end, I told her about "blessing & releasing".  I told her to be honest with them and tell them that she didn't steal them (like she already tried to explain) but if they don't want to believe her then she can't be friends with them right now.  And to move onto other children in the class that will make her feel good at the end of the day.   She seemed to like this idea. 

Did I give her the right advice?  Who knows...it's HARD being a mom, dangit! 

But, today is a snow day so she's home.  I hope, as 8 yr olds often do, these girls will have forgotten all about their accusations by the time they return to school tomorrow and all will be well in the 2nd grade.  But, if not, I wish my girl happiness in her heart as she works through the facts of life at school.  Seriously, why won't she just let me come sit by her everyday?

Funnies

I wanted to just share a couple funnies on this Monday morning--the things my kids say that just make me smile!

Let me set the scene:  I am home alone feeding the kids a delicious dinner of spaghettios & cucumbers on TV trays in the family room while talking on the phone with my dad.  (This was during kitchen remodel so we were avoiding the mess of that room)  I have given each child his or her plate of food & a juice box to drink, but I forgot to pass out the eating utensils and they were laying under a pile of napkins on the couch.  I'm a bit distracted as I am trying to do 15 things at once...

Jackie starts freaking out "I can't eat!  I can't eat my food!" 

Me:  "Why not?"

Jackie:  "I don't have any tupperware!"

Me:  "What?" 

Jackie:  "How am I supposed to ear my spaghettios with no tupperware?!?!"

Me:  "Silverware?"

Jackie:  "Oh yeah, silverware"


Scene 2: The 24/7 Christmas Song station is playing in the kitchen & we've been singing along all day.  The song Let It Snow comes on....

Josie (with huge eyes & a smile from ear to ear with excitement):  "I remember going to see this movie at the theater with Grandma & Grandpa!"

Me:  "We did see a movie at the theater with Grandma & Grandpa.  But it was Singing in the Rain."

Time

I don't usually buy the magazines at the grocery store checkout line, but yesterday I picked up People, with Elizabeth Edwards on the cover.  I brought it home & while the children played in their rooms & Joel was away at work I read it from cover to cover.  The five page article about Elizabeth Edward's battle with cancer made me sob.  What an amazing woman.  I haven't been able to get her out of my mind...

"The only thing we have control of is how you spend the time, that precious time."--Elizabeth Edwards, 2006

This morning my family piled into our bed & sang Christmas carols at the top of our lungs before we got up for breakfast.  It is my hope that during the hectic chaos of this holiday season each of you takes some precious time with your loved ones, doing something completely fun & memorable--and share it with me here!

What do YOU do?

I get this question everytime I meet someone new.  Now let me just start by saying that being a mom is a full time job.  It's a thankless job that does not pay NEARLY enough.  I knew when we found out that we were pregnant for the first time that Joel HAD to get a job so I could stay home with my baby.  As luck would have it, 4 short days after I peed on the stick, he got the DC gig.  I stayed home with Jackie for a year.  It was H.A.R.D!  Not only to be a new mom, but to get into a routine in a new town with a kid that did nothing but eat, sleep & poop.  I felt like I needed something more...for me.  So, that next fall I went back to work--first just to substitute as needed and as I wanted to.  But then I got a call that one of the elementary schools in the county needed an extra Kindergarten teacher.  And K. is where my heart is for teaching...so I took it.  It was fun, don't get me wrong.  But I drove 45 minutes to and from work every single day.  My first day of teaching was literally on Jackie's first birthday.  And then after 2 weeks of being back at work, my babysitter bailed on me.  I had to take several days off to find a new childcare situation.  The whole thing was a nightmare. 

Then I began working in the evenings and weekends with a company I had started shopping with over the summer before going back to teaching.  I did it from home, on my time and was paid for my efforts.  I enjoyed every minute of it and started hoping for snow days so I could work from home MORE!  Now I know that sometimes home businesses have a bad reputation--and there are many scams out there.  I've talked to more people who have been ripped off over the years & it's sad.  But I love what I do & after Josie came along, I quit teaching to pour all my efforts into my business.

It's challenging--to say the least--to get respect from certain people about what you do when you have your own home business.  I talk to complete strangers daily who don't know me, don't trust me, still have skepticism about what I'm telling them.  That rolls off my back because I really can't blame them.  However, it's those people you've known forever who don't respect what you do that kinda takes your breath away for a moment.  And I say a moment, because it really IS just for a moment.  I am confident about what I do and won't let anyone take that away from me. 

You see, I am still an educator.  And when I talk to people--friends, family, or complete strangers--I talk to them to help THEM.  It's truly about educating as many people as I can.  A stranger may not believe that of me right away and again, I can't really blame them.  They don't know me.  BUT if you DO know me and you still think I'm just talking to you to make a quick buck you are sorely mistaken.  I love providing a little extra income for my family.  I love driving a car that my company makes the car payments.  But I don't chase down my friends & family to only make a buck.  It's a genuine concern.  Just like when I was a teacher and I had a student who needed some extra help in school.  I didn't call the parents to schedule an appointment for a conference because it made ME more money or helped MY resume.  I called those parents in to educate them on the situation involving their child and what they do with that information was up to them--just like the information I share now. 

Now I'm rambling, on my soapbox.  Sorry...let me just say this.  It took guts for ME to quit teaching and pour my heart and soul into this business.  Joel & I have had many heart to hearts about this and he has been my #1 fan and supporter from Day 1.  If you have ever taken the time to let me share my company with you, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.  What you DO with that information is out of my control...but thank you for letting me educate you.  Fear of home based business is real because there ARE scams out there.  But if someone you know--someone you've known for YEARS--approaches you out of concern for you and your family, take the time to hear them out.  And if I personally happen to come to you--know this.  I am not going to chase you or try to convince you to do something you don't want to do.  If I have come to you & addressed a concern, I assure you it is genuine because I think I have a way to offer you a solution to some problem I've seen you having.

I've been able to help well over 600 families in the past 7+ years.  Some came to me because they wanted to make money and be home with their kids.  Some needed to find a solution to health issues their child or spouse was having.  I've talked to probably 5x's that many people but 600+ families found an answer here.  You can't find the answer if you don't look at all the options.

Perspective

Perspective:  a specific point of view in understanding or judging things or events.

This word has come to mind several times in the past 4 years.  This week it's one of Jackie's vocabulary words at school.  It amazes me that some people make it to adulthood with the "bubble" they live in & the things that actually come out of their mouths.  I guess it takes all kinds to make the world go round? 

Last summer I got a tattoo.  I honestly never wanted a tattoo.  But after my cancer journey decided it would be sometihng to serve as my "badge" of survival.  It was a gift to myself and I love it!

Just before I went to get it, I had someone say to me, "On your ankle?  That's gonna HURT!  Omygosh, are you sure you want it on your ankle?"  Hurt?  It's gonna hurt?  Let's get some perspective here--just weeks before this conversation I had my stomach cut from hip bone to hip bone and all the skin removed from my right breast, then replaced with the skin & tissue from my stomach.  I was in the hospital for 4 days, couldn't walk standing up straight for about 3 weeks and had 4 drains hanging from my breast and hips for 2 weeks.  A needle coloring on my ankle bone for 30 min is gonna HURT? 

I am also trying to gain an appropriate perspective going into my 60 mile walk next week.  I admit that I have lacked in training this year--I can give excuses, but I won't.  I am just not ready physically.  While talking with my team about blisters that we will most likely get within the first 5 miles (AHHHH!), I will have a mind over matter battle putting that "pain" into perspective.  Little J is still in the hospital undergoing treatment for her lukemia--she's been there for over 2 weeks now.  She's only 3 years old & being stuck with needles daily without a way to understand WHY (tho NONE of us can understand WHY).  When those blisters are bulging & the shin splints are screaming and my feet are cramping next weekend, I assure you that I will go further than I want to for little J.  She doesn't have a choice--neither will I.  

It's all about perspective. 

November 5

For the first 19 years of my life November 5 was just another day--one day closer to my favorite holiday, Thanksgiving.  Then I met my dear friend, A, my sophomore year of college and learned it was her birthday.  For the next 7 years it was the day I got to wish A a Happy Birthday.  In 2004, my lovebug, Josie Mae, came into the world on November 5.   Now she shared her birthday with someone I love so much--an amazing day!  In 2007, November 5 was the day after I gave birth to Bubba Boy and we celebrated Josie's 3rd birthday.  One year later, on November 5, my worst fears began to unfold. 

It was 2 years ago today.  Joel had been home from fall tour for a few days & I had found a lump.  How could I have POSSIBLY found a lump when I had a bilateral mastectomy & implants, you might wonder?  Well, it was there, in the skin.  And I saw my surgeon on November 5--Josie's 4th birthday.  First he claimed he couldn't find the lump and asked me to point it out.  Then he assured me it was scar tissue & did an ultrasound in the patient room.  But, he decided to send me to radiology for a better ultrasound and further testing--just to make sure.  He sent me off with these words "Either they'll tell you it's scar tissue and you need to come back in 6 months for your next checkup OR they'll tell you it's nothing.  I'll probably see you in 6 months!"  For the next 6 hours I went from ultrasound to needle biopsy to mammogram (yup, it was a "pinched" mammo where the poor tech had to hold my implant out of the way to get a visual of the lump...very interesting).  The radiologist who read my films that day was the same one who told me in June of 2006 to have my first lump removed.  She came into the room & I was reading a Women's Day magazine.  The look on her face told me all I needed to know.  She sent me back to my surgeon to schedule a biopsy.  I didn't need to wait the next 7 weeks for the biopsy results to find out--I knew that day. 

November 5, 2008 was just the beginning of our second cancer tour. November 5, 2010 has been a completely WONDERFUL day with cupcakes at school & a friend home on the bus, dinner out & ice cream sundaes for dessert.  It's amazing to me how one day can hold so many memories and meanings for you while giving you so many mixed emotions. 

November 5--Happy Birthday A & Josie Mae and thank you to the docs who spent so much time with me on this day 2 years ago to make sure I got the best advice possible so I can see many more November 5 in the future.   

Month of Thanks

Today my head has been swimming with thoughts.  My morning started with a trip to the doc with my little man.  It was his 2yr/3yr old well baby checkup.  Why 2/3yr you ask?  Yes, I FORGOT to take him for his 2 yr old checkup.  FORGOT.  I admit, that in my multiple trips to the doc for preop appts, surgeon for post surgery appts, urologist for kidney stones, lab for xrays & MRIs on my foot in the past 16 months, I let it slip my mind that my little guy may not be up-to-date on his vaccines.  SO, today we went for his 2/3yr old appointment and I have said thank you more than once for the clean bill of health. 

You see, while sitting at this particular appointment I got a text from Joel informing me that friends of ours were sitting in a hospital room with their 3 yr old daughter undergoing treatment for lukemia.  When I got home, I had an email update from my neighbor's niece regarding her 5 yr old's MRI test today and clinical trial starting on Thursday for his inoperable brain tumor.  And then a coworker asked for prayers as a 20 yr old child of her friend undergoes treatment for her 3rd round of cancer, currently planning her wedding as it is her only wish as they fear a devistating outcome for her. 

November is the month of thanks.  And on November 25 we will sit around our dining room tables and say thanks for all that we have.  I am thankful that I have a beautiful family & amazing friends.  I am thankful that I can say I am a survivor.  But I am mostly thankful for the little people in the world--like H, J & K--who remind me that I can be a better person as they are fighting a fight I will NEVER know or EVER understand.  My heart is with these 3 families tonight and through this month of thanks as everyday is truly a blessing.  Thank you for touching my life in more ways than you can possibly know. 

Family Traditions

It's coming into the big holiday season & with the holidays come family traditions.  It's interesting to me, looking back, that as our family dynamics have changed, some of our traditions did as well.  Now that Joel & I have our own little family here, we've started a tradition--not really related to the holidays, but happened to fall just before the holidays this year--The Great Wolf Lodge Adventure.

Now, let me tell you the Great Wolf Lodge is a great family place.  We were introduced by friends back in 2005--Jackie was 2 1/2 yrs old & Josie was just 5 months old.  We took a weekend and drove to the Williamsburg location, which was brand new at the time.  It happened to be Mother's Day weekend and also my birthday when we went, so Joel had called ahead and surprised me with both a full body massage AND pedicure in the spa at the lodge.  I was still teaching full time then.  Joel had just gotten home from a 2-3 week tour, during which time I was still teaching, had both girls in the evenings and Josie was still nursing at night.  It had been a rough couple of weeks.  And he was so apologetic when he told me the only appointment for a pedicure was at 8:00.  Seriously?  On my first weekend with my husband home & my first opportunity to sleep in, I had to get up for an 8am pedicure?  But the thought was SO sweet, I couldn't complain & Saturday morning I woke up, showered, dried my hair and slipped out of the room while everyone else was still sleeping to get my feet pampered.  When I got to the spa down on the 1st floor, the doors were locked and all the lights were out.  There was one woman behind the desk inside so I knocked on the door.  When she came to open it, I told her I was there for my 8:00 appointment, to which she replied "We don't open till 9."  Hmmmm...after a quick look at her appointment book, she discovered that my sweet husband had misunderstood and the pedicure was for 8:00 P.M.  After MY apologies, I took the elevator back up to our room and walked in just as the troops were rising for the day.  I did not get to go back to sleep--instead enjoyed much fun at the water park that day and after dinner got to slip away for a delightful appointment with a quiet young lady who painted my toes pink that night.  When I returned to the room, both girls were asleep and hubby was waiting on the balcony with wine in hand.  What a sweet man.

Our tradition is that we have gone back every year.  We've just returned from our 6th trip to the Great Wolf Lodge.  The girls are getting braver with every visit.  And while some things are the same--many things change.  We joked this year about what age they will be when they'll be too old to go to the Great Wolf Lodge with mom and dad anymore.  I dread that day...but I savor all the sweet memories we're making each year on our traditional trip.  I hope one day we'll be able to keep the tradition going with extended family--as we take our kids AND grandkids to the water park for 3 days of SO MUCH FUN!

Daddy's Boy

Daddy's Boy

Note the blue marker--his favorite color--on his arms and cheeks.  You cannot see the solid blue palms of his hands, but they're there too.  

Yep, it's only Day 3 of tour...

Let the Fun Begin...

So, another October equals another tour.  Another month of fall festivals, pumpkin picking & carving and costume creating as a "single" mom.  Now, my hats off to the single moms out there...those who raise their kids alone for months at a time while Daddy is deployed and those who are true single parents doing this Mommy or Daddy thing solo.  This isn't a piece of cake & you are my heros...

Today actually went rather smoothly.  We started with Joel's alarm going off at 6am which woke up everyone in the house--earlier than necessary.  I love my husband, but the man has no idea what it means to be quiet when the rest of the house is still sleeping.  By 6:15am, he's said goodbye to me 4 x's and I have 2 extra little bodies in my bed with another awake & dressed in her room.  Let me just add here that I don't do mornings--I have a mug that has a picture of Tinkerbell saying "Mornings Are Not Magical."  This did not set me in the best mood, but it DID mean we were not rushed to get to the bus stop. 

Jamison & I had a great day--we went to his exercise class, we had lunch & after his nap we took a walk to get the girls from the bus stop.  That's when it got exciting.  Basically, the rest of the night went like this...rush Big J to horse riding lesson, fight with Middle & Little J to get back in the car.  Drive home for a short check into email while Little J successfully rips one door off family room entertainment center.  Drive back to get Big J.  Fight with Little J to stay out of mud, leave the big rocks on the ground, get in the car...drive back home.  Throw frozen pizza rolls in oven & sit Big J in kitchen to work on homework while Middle J sits in dining room working on homework.  Fight with Little J to keep him from playing with oven door, microwave buttons & radio timer.  Dinner on the table, everyone enjoying dinner, jump up after about 3 bites to answer phone call from mortgage company calling to schedule closing date for refinancing that Daddy J has been working on for the last several weeks.  Explain situation of hubby out of town & agree to call him to get some answers.  Meanwhile, all Js want MORE food, Momma!  Reheat oven, watch my food get cold & try to keep cool as hubby answers phone and explains that he can't get me my answers right then because HIS food--which has been prepared FOR him & which he does not have to SHARE with anyone of a single digit age--has just arrived at the table.  I kept my cool, but also got what I was calling for, no doubt.  While talking to mortgage company again, I stop the race that has begun down the hall.  More hot pizza rolls for Big & Middle J but too hot to eat right away.  Off to shower & baths....then finish homework & reading for the read-a-thon fundraiser.  Oh then the phone rings again--and it's the lady scheduled to meet Joel for closing tomorrow...again, when I call him to give him her number it's not really a good time. This time he's at the liquor store.  But he doesn't bother calling me back--he just requests a text with the info I was going to give him on the phone.  To his defense, it IS hard being on tour... 

8:30 my children are finally in bed.  Momma's exausted.  And we've only got 1 day down...there are still 20 to go...I'm waiting for the "fun" to begin!

Getting Ready for October...

The Love/Avon Army of Women (AOW) is a unique program of the Dr. Susan Love Research Foundation, a 501 (c) 3 non-profit breast cancer research organization. The program is funded through a grant from the Avon Foundation for Women. The AOW provides an opportunity for men and women to take part in breast cancer research studies aimed at determining the causes of breast cancer—and how to prevent it. The AOW is a groundbreaking initiative that connects breast cancer researchers via the internet with women who are willing to participate in a wide variety of research studies. The goal of the Army of Women is to recruit ONE MILLION MEN AND WOMEN of all ages and ethnicities, including breast cancer survivors and those who have never had breast cancer.

How can we cure something if we don’t know what we’re curing? Plain and simple, the Army of Women hopes to STOP CANCER BEFORE IT STARTS. By enlisting ONE MILLION WOMEN to participate in breast cancer research, we will be able to finally take the research out of the lab and look at real women. This will enable us to finally find the CAUSES of breast cancer and ultimately figure out how to prevent it all together. BILLIONS of dollars have been spent on breast cancer research to date, but we still don’t know what CAUSES it. While many advances in treatment have been made, our goal is to eradicate it once and for all, by preventing it in the first place. We discovered that cervical cancer was caused by a virus, the HUMAN papillomavirus. The way we discovered the cause of cervical cancer was by studying WOMEN. With a lot less money, and in a lot less time, we now have a cure because we now know WHAT to cure. We need to follow the same path and move breast cancer beyond a cure.

Join today at www.armyofwomen.org.  Together, we can move breast cancer beyond a cure and eradicate it once and for all.

Please watch the following youtube video (that I do not know how to post the right way). And join us in preventing this horrible disease.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JBqNkN5NG4