Commitment

My Webster's New World dictionary defines commitment as a pledge or promise to do something.  I like this definition.  You see, commitment has come up as a topic of conversation alot lately.

For 7 years I have committed my time to my own business.  I commit time from my family, time from watching TV and just simply reaching my personal goals.  It's not easy to be your own boss, set your own goals & hold yourself accountable to yourself!  But I'm committed for my family.  I am committed because I love what I do & I want my kids to know they can do anything they set their minds to.  They have to have a little will power, maybe some stubborness (which I don't think they'll have a problem with) and COMMITMENT!  Jackie has been saying she wants to be a veterinarian since she was 3 yrs old.  Yes, she's gotta lot of life before she makes that decision for sure, but with an aunt who committed her life to medicine, she has a great role model to show her what that commitment means--lots of years of school, little lady!  If she's willing to commit to that goal, I know she will achieve it.

I recently had a conversation with a friend about marriage.  Now there's another commitment that I took 11 years ago.  I've recently been talking to Joel about renewing our vows--maybe have a big ol' party at 15 years!  Wanna come??:)  Well, I realized in attending a couple dear friends' weddings this year that the vows we took in April of 1999 mean something completely different now that we've LIVED them than they did the day we committed them to each other.  I cannot hold back the tears when I hear the traditional vow "in sickness & in health"  All those years ago we never could have imagined how much those words would ring true for us as a married couple.  I want my children to learn that even when there's anger & hard times that our vows were our committment to work through it.  I hope they go into their own relationships in the VERY FAR future with that same dedication.

For the past 3 years I've walked in the Susan G Komen Breast Cancer 3 Day.  This event requires LOTS of commitment!  First of all, you commit to raising $2300 just to qualify to walk!  This was a tad intimidating to me the first time I signed up, but I pledged to make it happen in time & I did.  It never occured to me, it simply never crossed my mind, that I might not get enough money.  I just didn't know exactly how I would do it, but the commitment was there.  Now after you have your qualifying money, it's a commitment of WALKING 60 miles.  That's 60 miles--or 22, 22 & 16 miles for 3 consecutive days.  SIXTY MILES!  I thought it would be no problem--I was in good shape that first year...it's just walking, right?  You know what's harder than walking 60 miles for the first time?  Making a commitment to walk 60 miles AGAIN!  Seriously--because you already know what it's going to feel like...your feet are hurting before opening ceremonies start, your muscles are screaming NOOOO, and your blisters are doing the happy dance because they know they're going to have a party on your feet in just a matter of a few hours! 

Commitment--a pledge or promise to do something.  I'll tell you, these 3 commitments are 3 of the best ones I ever made.  A couple of years ago Jackie started dancing in a new dance studio and mid way thru the year she decided she didn't enjoy it very much anymore.  This was the perfect opportunity for me to teach her about commitment and share my examples--she was already choreographed into the final recital, mom & dad had already paid for her to attend the classes & recital, and she needed to follow thru with the commitment she made at the beginning of the year.  I'm so proud of her--she was the cutest little blue bird in the Cinderella recital.  And one day she'll be able to share that experience of HER commitment with her children. 

Family Movies & Word Families

Tonight we celebrated the end of the first week of school with a family movie.  We had checked out the movie Goonies from the library last weekend so tonight we got to sit down and watch it.  It was made 25 years ago--I still remember going to the movie theater to see it with my neighbors.  My mom still tells the story about my neighbor's mom coming home and being horrified at the language in the movie.  Well....let's just say that I had forgotten how many times they say S%#!  All in all, the girls enjoyed the movie--we had a few great laughs.  It's so fun to watch them giggle.:)
Well, I know my girls know that word is not appropriate.  But, we watched this movie 2 years too late for me to blame it for Jackie's word family incident in Kindergarten.  For those that missed THAT story...I showed up to volunteer for the afternoon and the class was still at recess.  Jackie's teacher, an old coworker of mine, started giggling and said she needed to share a story with me.  She would've called me the night before but knew I was coming in the next day and wanted to see my face in person.  During reading groups the day before they were talking about the "it" word family.  There were 4 or 5 children (THANKFULLY) in Jackie's group working with Ms. K.  The task at hand was to take the dry erase board and add a letter to the front of the "it" to make a new word in the word family.  Someone wrote "hit", another wrote "lit" and then Jackie wrote....yes, you know...."shit".  When Ms. K. saw it she gasped and said "Jackie, do you know that word is not appropriate?"  She smiled and said "Noooo," while another child says outloud "Shit?  What is shit?  What does shit mean?" 

So, yeah, I'm THAT mom.  And that's MY kid.  Thankfully Jackie's teacher has a good sense of humor and I happened to know the mom of the other child who apparently had never heard the word before.  I politely approached her at the next school event and told her if he started saying it at home she could just call and blame me.  Fortunately she just laughed.:) 

So, now Josie is in Kindergarten--word families will be learned this year.  Wonder what stories she'll provide...

Wow!

Picture this--my green car is parked, pulled front in first in the parking spot and as I approach there's another car backing into the spot on my driver's side.  As I get closer I realize she's REALLY close to my car.  And as I'm upon her front bumper I see her side mirror scrape the side of my car...but she hasn't seen me yet.  So she ever so slyly yanks her mirror to fold it into the car and leaves a white streak of paint from her car on the rear of my green car.  That's the moment she sees me and first she deverts her gaze while mumbling under her breath--something about don't start with me and a few profanities as her window was down and I'm a fabulous lip reader.  I'm just staring at this happening--no look of disqust on my face, no words out of my mouth so her appropriate response at that moment is to shout out her window "Ain't no one touched your car!"  Um, again, I've said nothing.  I've not even given her a dirty look--YET.  So I wait patiently, as I begin to rub the white paint off my car.  She slowly, ever so slowly, parks her car, rolls up her window and then gets her store name badge from her rearview mirror and gets out of her car.  YEP, this here folks is a genuine customer service focused EMPLOYEE of the establishment from where I've just made a purchase!  She tries to avoid eye contact again as she goes around her car, but I stopped her.  I know at this moment that I might possibly be physically assalted in the parking lot of this shopping chain.  I realize that I'm going to be late to pick up Jackie from her horse riding lesson (not like she'll mind) and Joel will have to figure out how to deal with the kids AND pick me up from the police station after giving them my statement.  But she's not gonna side swipe my car--while I'm watching--and then YELL at me that no one did anything!  So I said, very politely of course, "Excuse me.  But you DID touch my car with yours.  See this white paint?  This is paint from your side window.  And there's no damage...the paint will rub right off, but you DID do it and there's just no reason to get so nasty with me."  She said "Oh, sorry." (you know the tone, like a smart a$$ little punk with an attitude) and started to walk off...but no, that's not enough.  I wanted to say like I say with my kids "Sorry for what?" but I didn't.  Instead the mother in me came out, despite that little voice saying "don't do it, just shut up and let it go" I said "I know accidents happen but you shouldn't try to lie about it." And that was too much, I guess becasue she spat "I SAID I WAS SORRY!" and stormed off for her evening shift at work.  Maybe the fact that she was already wearing her employee badge is what kept her from opening up a can on me...WOW. 

Yes, I've written a polite email to the store manager including the make, model and license plate # of her car because I honestly didn't think to look at her name badge and get her name.  I was shaking for the next hour with fury.  Truly, my car is fine.  But that's not the point,  AMERICA!   Man up--when I backed that same car into the house and the other side was covered in white paint from my siding, I didn't try to lie about it.  I didn't place blame on someone else.  I sobbed like a baby for an hour so Joel wouldn't be SO mad at me. 

I am just glad that #1 the accident magnet of a car really ISN't damaged and #2 I didn't make the evening news with the headline "Southern Maryland woman assalted in local store parking lot"...I totally want to be in the news for something better than that!:)

I like it, I love it, I want some more of it!

I'm training for the Susan G Komen Breast Cancer 3 Day. This is my third year. The first year I walked because I had just had Jamison & I was ready to get back in shape, but I was just over a year cancer free and wanted to do something BOLD. Folks, there's not much bolder than the 3day. My team of 8 walked in Washington DC over a gorgeous October weekend in 2008. I had a dear friend and her mom FLY from Florida to walk with us. It was such an emotional weekend, one I had not been appropriately prepared for. We had aching muscles, tired feet and blisters the size of Montana! We came home from that weekend satisfied that we'd gotten all we could get from that event. But less than a month later I found a lump. And just weeks after that, confirmation that the cancer had returned. So, in a tearful email, I approached my team about walking with me again in 2009--not even knowing what the year would hold for me in terms of treatment & recovery. Seven of the 8 of us signed up again--but this time we had additional girls join us. After a major surgery in May--4 days in the hospital & 6 weeks of recovery--we walked the 2009 3Day in DC again. This time our emotions were completely different--but we decided now that I had officially kicked cancer's butt twice and was cancer free that we had accomplished our goals with the event & left the final day with the decision that "next year" would be a year of rest.
It's funny how you can have your mind SO SET on doing something, or in this case NOT doing something, and one little thing changes it. A dear college friend had been diagnosed with breast cancer around the same time we found out mine had returned. She had it far worse than me--undergoing a bilateral mastectomy, chemo and radiation before her reconstruction could even begin--and at the age of 33. She sent me a message, just days after our 2009 walk, and said she was taking a team to walk in the 2010 San Diego 3Day. CRAP! The email went out AGAIN--to my faithful team--and there are 5 of us joining my friend H in San Diego this November for 3 more days, 60 more miles and endless amounts of memories. This year I will walk into the closing ceremonies with my pink survivor shirt holding the hand of another dear survivor, H. I had another major surgery with an incredibly long recovery following the decision to sign up for #3. So my training was delayed. 2010 has already brought me 2 more minor surgeries for reconstruction, a kidney stone & bruised bone on my right foot when I fell down the stairs--more delays in training.

Today I walked 3.5 miles on the boardwalk of the bay. Nothing close to the 22 miles we'll walk Day 1 in just 3 short months, but it's a start. And just as my man, Timmy McGraw was singing in my ipod today, I like it, I love it, I want some more of it! I cannot WAIT to get my feet on that San Diego pavement and kick some breast cancer booty AGAIN. 60 miles, 3 days, 1 cure...we walk so our girls won't have to....

First Day of School

Today my little love bug had her first day of Kindergarten.  After her drama at orientation yesterday, I was a bit concerned about today, but it went off without a hitch! 

6:30am our alarm clock goes off.  Of course we hit snooze.  So when we got up at 6:37am and went to the girls' room to wake them up, we found them both in Jackie's top bunk fully dressed.  They claimed they don't remember getting up to get dressed, but we knew better--these are 2 very excited little girls. 

Now, let me take you back to last night when we were picking out these clothes.  First thing Jackie picked was a green school tshirt and orange striped shorts.  I told her she couldn't wear the shorts because they're too short for school, plus they don't match and she said "Who cares, mom!  It's only school!"  So, I guess I am not going to have to worry about her being "hung up" on her clothes?  Then, the tshirt she put on when she woke up got yogurt spilled on it, to which she said "Who cares mom!  No one will care if I wear a dirty shirt to school!"  Then the 2nd shirt she put on she got toothpaste all over and again "MaaaahhhhMMMMM! People will think it's just PAINT!"  And when we finally settled on the THIRD shirt of the day, she made it all the way home with nothing on it.

Both girls rushed off the bus--Jackie declared that she had two BFF's this year.  And when we asked Josie if she'd played with her friend Diego at school today she said, "No, I played with my new best friend!"  Joel said, "Oh really?  What's her name?"  And her response was "I dunno." 

But I guess that really isn't important.  What's important is that they found other little people who were having the same excited & nervous feelings today and they made it through the day together.  Knowing they've got a long year ahead of them, it's nice to know they've got friends to take the journey with them. 

As for this momma, I am proud of them both for being so brave as I remember how scary the first day of school can be.  And I savored EVERY SINGLE moment of Bubba's naptime when the house was so silent I could ACTUALLY hear myself think today.  This is just the first day of a great school year....

Guest Blogger: SIL Sara Bennett Wealer

You may have noticed a book in the right column with a link to preorder--this is a blog entry from the author and my sister-in-law Sara Bennett Wealer!  Check it out!  And make sure you consider preordering her book!:)

It was probably always meant to come to this


/waves/ Hi, everybody! And hello to any new friends who may have found me thanks to early buzz about my book. RIVAL doesn't come out until February, and I'm only just now doing a few things to start getting the word out. One of those is dusting off this blog and starting to post stories people might actually be interested in reading. No promises that I'll be here every day - I have two small children, a day job and a husband who works insane hours, but I will be here more than usual. So whether you're new or an old friend, I hope you'll enjoy the new "posty" me.



Yay! So what's today's topic, Sara?




I thought I'd talk a little about how I came to write RIVAL, since I get asked that question a lot in interviews. People want to know what inspired the story, which is about two singers--once friends, now enemies--in an elite high school program who are getting ready to go up against each other in a major competition. I've also been asked whether the book is based on any of my own experiences.



The answer to that second question is no. People who grew up with me might recognize a couple of homages to our hometown, but the entire plot of RIVAL is fiction, as it should be or it wouldn't be fiction, right?



As for inspiration, well, I also was a singer in a pretty competitive program, so the memories of how that felt--the pressure, the practicing, the paranoia that somebody might do better--definitely informed what and how I wrote. But the truth is that I wrote RIVAL because I probably couldn't have written anything else, at least not as a debut author.



See, music and performing were my *thing* all through school. They were so much a part of me that I sort of had to get them out of my system before I could write about anything else.



I'm not sure where the urge to sing and perform came from. It's not like I come from a family of performers. I grew up in a small Kansas town and, in those days, we didn't have dozens of Nick and Disney shows telling kids they could all be stars. But my mom did teach at the high school, and she took me to all of the musicals. She also took me to concerts by the Pops Choir (MHS's version of "Glee"). Don't ask me how Manhattan, Kansas, got so many awesome singers over so many years, but those shows were GOOD! They might as well have been Broadway as far as I was concerned.



I remember it clicked for me in third grade when our music teacher held auditions for the class play, Alice in Wonderland. The girls trying out for Alice had to sing this song about giving themselves very good advice, and I just knew I could nail it. Guess what? I did. I got the lead and I was hopelessly lost after that.



Looking back, I imagine I was pretty obnoxious. I sang solos in church almost every other week. I wrote and choreographed shows for my friends to put on for our class. I couldn't wait to get up to high school so *I* could be in the musicals and Pops Choir. I got into the top choruses early and had leads in almost all of the shows. When the TV show "Glee" first came out, I saw a lot of myself in the ultra-driven character of Rachel Berry.



But where Rachel knows she's destined to be a star, strangely I don't remember having that vision. While I loved being on stage, somehow I think I knew I wasn't good enough to make it in the real world, against the millions of other singers who were light years better than me. Majoring in voice performance for a couple of years in college confirmed that. The dream died fairly quietly, to be replaced with the wonderful discovery that you don't have to be a pro to keep performing. I wrote and starred in shows for my sorority's Rock Chalk Revue. I sang with elite choruses in Pittsburgh and Cincinnati.



And then, I used what I knew and loved to write a book. Like I said earlier, RIVAL sort of felt like it had to be - like I couldn't write about anything else until I wrote something about being a singer in high school. I hope girls who are like I was then will see themselves in it, and I hope the book rings true for them. I also hope people who don't know much about the arts will have their interests piqued as well.

Goodbye summertime...

We decided to take a last minute camping trip this weekend to celebrate the end of summer for the girls as school begins this week.  Saturday morning was spent loading the car down with the gear, packing the cooler with drinks & food and then off we went.  Upon arrival we found Uncle J and little J & E waiting at the campsite next to ours.  This weekend it was just Me & The Boys + 5 kiddos.  Of course, this detail of D being out of town was left out of the planning information until we were in the car and on our way...but I wasn't worried.  I knew it only meant that much more adventure would await us. 

First order of business was setting up the tents while the kids began exploring.  After "home" was settled, then we took the kids for a trip to the playground made of recycled tires.  Jamison could've used some judo tips from Daddy on how to tuck 'n' roll when he went flying off the tire swing, but he came away unharmed and back to the site we went.  The boys went for wood, the girls gathered sticks...dinner was roasted hotdogs & cheetos for the kids and crabs & beer for the grown ups.  Enter the knife set--OH MY!  You see, Joel & I have lived in Maryland for 8 years...and only ONCE actually had crabs where you have to crack them open and pick them.  We don't have actual crab eating tools, so Joel brought along this knife set he'd received as a gift from my dad some years back.  I don't remember him getting it, but I say it again--OH MY!  These knives could be used for defense...they were frightening.  We each picked our tool of wonder and dug in--trial & error.  Between the 3 of us, we were able to create our own crab eating technique to ensure we got enough meat to fill our bellies.  Meanwhile, our children found ants and threw them in the fire...

After dinner, roasting marshmallows and eating smores was our evening activity...followed by reading books (thank you Uncle J for remembering bedtime stories) and bedtime.  The boys and I stayed up for several hours just sharing stories.  Mind you, we've been friends for nearly 10 years but it always seems you learn something new when you actually have a moment w/out the interruption of small ones.  What a great evening!

About 11pm we started feeling random raindrops and thanks to modern technology we were able to do a quick search of the weather and find the rain that was previously scheduled to arrive at 4pm the next day had actually been moved up to 4am.  Before we turned in for the night, we prepared the site for possible rain and hoped that would give us the luck to keep it away.  Unfortunately we woke up to showers...and instead of pancakes by campfire & a hike to the river for fishing, we loaded the cars in the early morning light and went to the local McDonalds for breakfast.  

I admit that camping is not my FAVORITE activity, tho I do enjoy it with my family occassionally--provided there are bathrooms within walking distance that provide a flushing toilet.  But last night, as I lay in the tent with my adorable munchkins entertwined like a bunch of spaghetti noodles, I was in complete heaven.  This evening, as we shared our favorite moments of camping over dinner, the kids lit up remembering, just hours before, the adventure we had taken.  It was $20 for the site, we took food we already had and only drove an hour & 1/2 to the park.  They rode bikes, ran races, explored trails, told stories, played ball, found a frog, threw ants in the fire...that's what childhood is all about.  I was THRILLED to be home and in the air conditioning with a shower and a sink to wash my hands with soap, BUT wouldn't trade the memories we made this weekend for anything in the world.  Goodbye summertime fun, hello school year... 

Borrowed this from a FB post of a friend...truly something to think about...

An old man said to his grandson, "Boy, I have two tigers caged within me. One is Love and Compassion. The other is Fear and Anger."

The young boy asked, "Which on will win, Grandfather?"

The old man replied, "The one I feed."

Ain't Goin' Nowheres!

Well, folks...Christmas came early for me today.  I've been complaining for MONTHS about my old, slow, frustrating computer.  Today, after power washing our entire house on his day off, my husband knocked on my office door, opened it and sat a gigantic box on the floor.  "MERRY CHRISTMAS," he says and then closed the door and walked away.  Yep, this amazing man who drives me crazy on a regular basis bought me a new computer--and SERIOUSLY surprised me with it today.  Seems that he's enjoying my blog so much that he doesn't want to hinder the writing process!  HA!!! So, it looks like I ain't goin' nowheres...this blog is here to stay! 

27 minutes...

During one of the workshops I attended at my recent business convention, I heard a statistic that goes something like this..."The average American couple spends 27 minutes/week having a 1 on 1 conversation."  You know, talking about adult things to another adult together...and as a parent of three children under the age of 7, this makes sense to me.  I can see where this might happen.  Fortunately for us, we have schedules that allow us to be home more often together and spend more time talking.  Well, I said fortunate....let me backtrack.  You see, last week while sitting in this workshop many many many miles & 2 time zones away from my husband, I felt very fortunate that we don't fall into that statistic.  We definitely spend more than 27 minutes a week talking--about our work, our plans, our future, our dreams.  And then tonight the kids were in their rooms playing after dinner, we were in the living room alone with no TV to distract us and we started talking.  It only took a few minutes, only one smart-A$$ comment from that man and I told him that I now understand why most couples don't talk more, especially if they're married to a husband like mine.  So here's a case in point...this is a Facebook conversation starting with my youngest brother-in-law writing on his new wife's wall "I love you baby" and then the following comments...   

John Wealer i love you baby..

                 Adam Wealer oh god 

                Gina Richardson watch it, brother-in-law.... :)

• Jennifer Reisenbichler-Wealer awwww, john boy, i love it! adam, be nice. those 2 can beat us up!
•  

  Joel Wealer I may have just thrown up in my mouth a bit....
•  

  Jennifer Reisenbichler-Wealer Whatever Joel--you could learn a lesson or 2 from your romantic younger/bigger brother...
•  

  Joel Wealer Adam said something, so I had to also. My bad... ·
•  

  Adam Wealer I only did it because I knew joe would think it was cool...
•  
• Jennifer Reisenbichler-Wealer Oh good grief...
•  
• Joel Wealer It was so cool cuz my big brother said it!  
•  
• Adam Wealer that's me!

 

 

 

So, welcome to the family, Gina.  I hope the conversations in your house are more grown up than the ones from your husband's brothers.  And I wish you WAY more than 27 minutes of happy talking for the rest of your weeks together! 

Trying New Things....

Two years ago, at convention, my friends decided we needed to go out for sushi.  I had never had sushi.  So, out of desire to spend time with them, I agreed to go if they'd order for me and make sure I didn't get anything too "fishy."  I will tell you that was one of the best times I've ever had--me with my training chopsticks & MB eating the whole edamame before she knew what it was!  We laughed and laughed and laughed.  So, this year when we went for our 3rd annual sushi dinner, I had another first.  I ate octopus!  Yep!  What did it taste like?  I know you wanna know--especially if you're an octopus eating virgin like I was.  And I actually dropped it in my little bowl of soy sauce because, even 2 years later, I am still NO good with the chopsticks!  So, it tasted mostly like soy sauce but it was the texture that got me.  It was a little chewy and it popped in my teeth--EWWWW!  My cheeks were sore after dinner from all the laughing again.  I came home and told my girls about Mommy eating octopus.  They were a little wigged out, but I told them they should not be afraid to try new things....

Take My Breath Away...

Life's not the breaths you take
Breathin in and out
That gets you through the day
Ain't what it's all about
Ya just might miss the point
Tryin to win the race
Life's not the breaths you take
But the moments that take your breath away

These are the words to a song by country star George Strait & I love it.  My girls are counting down the days (Oh, who am I kidding?  We're ALL counting down the days) till school starts next week.  This year my big girl Jackie will be in 2nd grade & my little lovebug Josie Mae starts Kindergarten.  This child can truly challenge me as a mom & loving parent on a regular basis but I think I just might be a little choked up next week when she gets on that big ol' yellow school bus.  She's picked out a horse backpack like her big sister.  They have matching lunch boxes and she's even started asking for PB&J sandwiches when otherwise she used to HATE peanut butter.  They grow up so fast...it's slipping away.  Today the girls sang Garth Brooks songs in the backseat of the car at the top of their lungs, they swam like little fishies in the neighbor's pool & tonight we cuddled while we read books.  I have one more full year with the little Bubba Boy at home with me playing "To Infinity & Beyond" and watching Dora before he starts part-time preschool.  Too many times I have wished for the day to be over for more reasons that one, but it's so true about how fast it slips by.  Before I know it, they'll be starting High School and the we'll take them off to college?  Really?  Well, for now, I'll keep looking for and treasuring the little moments that take my breath away....

Sometimes you just know...

Let me take you back to our life in Michigan as a newly married couple. Joel is in school, getting his Masters in Music Performance & we've just purchased our first house. It's nothing fancy but we're working on making it ours & loving every minute of it. Since Joel's so busy with school and doing several gigs in the area, I have taken on the task of teaching 3rd grade in an inner city school for a significant pay raise so he can quit his part-time job & focus on playing his horn. This job is both the most challenging & the most rewarding job I've had to this point in my life & I love it but I'm quite tired and stressed at the end of each week. Friday night during one of these exact weeks Joel has a gig with the orchestra from school & I am calling it an early night....but around 11pm my phone rings. "Hello?" An unfamiliar voice on the other end of the phone says, "Jenny, this is T and I'm calling because Joel is going to need a ride home." And I know that they've been drinking (tho I'm not sure WHERE since they've been on a bus with the school orchestra and later find out it was ON THE BUS), and I'm not mad that someone has called to come get him but that I am thinking at this point that Joel is TOO drunk to even dial his phone & now I'm very very angry. After my quick pick up, including screeching tires as we drove away, T is pretty sure we are not going to be friends. Fast forward 2 years & now we all live in the DC area and I have just given birth to our first baby, Jackie Sue. T is one of 3 guests we had in the hospital, arriving with flowers & lots of love from Jackie's "uncle". Two more years later, here's Josie Mae and Uncle T in the hospital room. Now here's the part that amazes me...first of all, he's single with no girlfriend making him come see us. But when Josie is 18 months old and I'm in the hospital having a bilateral mastectomy for breast cancer, T is one of the onle who comes to visit--with pillows in hand since there are none to be found at the hospital (no really, they had NO pillows for me). Another year later I have our 3rd baby and while Joel is at home with the girls, T shows up with lunch & flowers...just me and Uncle T in the hospital room, him holding the baby Jamison with so much love. But it doesn't end there--exactly 1 yr later the cancer is back and when I have my next big surgery & have to spend 4 days in the hospital, T calls--already on his way--wanting to know what I want for lunch. I'm craving cold food so he brings me a salad & fresh fruit which took him well out of his way to find. I walk the Susan G Komen Breast Cancer 3day in DC in 2008 & 2009 and T is there--08 at closing ceremonies and 09 riding his bike to find me while I walk thru downtown. Now T has found the love of his life. And if he'd asked me to hand pick someone for him to love and spend the rest of his life with, I couldn't have done better. K is the most perfect match for this most perfect friend who we call part of our family. We were blessed to attend their wedding this summer--Joel was able to stand up for T and be part of the wedding. I cried from the moment we arrived that weekend. There are very few genuine people in this world. T is one of those people and it started way back when he called me to pick up his friend even against Joel's wishes. I couldn't be happier for T & K. No one could doubt the love they feel for each other, but none of his friends will doubt his loyalty to us either. Sometimes you just know....

Glad I brought my bucket...

So, I've just returned from a 4 day trip. This was my annual trip to my company's national convention. But this year was the best year of the past 6 I've attended and there are 2 reasons. #1 Our company--wowza! This is the 25th year in business, and they're stronger than ever. The trainings, the entertainment, the new info was beyond our wildest expectations. But my favorite reason for this trip was my bucket & I'm so glad I brought it.:) You see, when I started this business 7 years ago, I was a SAHM with a 9 month old daughter. I had only lived in this state for a year and since I didn't have a job, I didn't have any friends. I literally knew my daughter & my husband and a couple of the wives of Joel's coworkers. So, this business was a way for me to make connections with other moms around the country each day from the comfort of my home WHILE bringing in an income. My mentor, B, had a way of connecting people on her team. She had a way of making sure we knew we were not alone in this & she brought us together. In August of 2006, just weeks after I found out I had cancer, we all met in person--most of us for the first time--at our annual national convention. Just 6 months later, B unexpectedly passed away. And so our business family grew closer & stronger than ever before. Now, each year when we get together, we toast B for introducing us and creating our bond. We nurture that bond daily thru phone calls & skype messaging as we are scattered literally from coast to coast--Seattle to DC and TX to Canada. These girls are my sisters. When I am having a bad business day--no matter the time of day--I can get online and someone is there to talk to...but it's more than biz with these ladies. We share husband & child woes. And then we also share our dreams & aspirations. My favorite thing about these women is that they fill my bucket, everyday. And so we get to be together once a year at our annual national convention. For 4 days & 3 nights we hug & laugh & cry & dream & love & fill each other's buckets. Even if the workshops & the speakers were cut from the budget and we had nothing but time together, I wouldn't trade those 4 days for anything in the world. When I got off the plane last night I had a FULL bucket. For 4 days I was told by many that they believed in me, they were inspired by me, they loved & respected me...all the things any of us crave in our lives. And what I know the biggest challenge now will be is to keep that bucket close to my heart in the coming days when those feelings get ripped away by the reality of life & the nonbelievers surrounding me. It's hard to come home sometimes...but lucky for me I brought my bucket.

Tri...do you mean TRY?

So, earlier this summer I was invited to a bridal shower for a dear friend. Joel & I have been friends with the groom for nearly 11 years so that's how I came to know the bride, K. As I arrived, I was taken around to meet the bride's friends. I realized very quickly that less than 1/2 of the room was married & only 2 of us were moms (the other mom is another long time friend of the groom). Now, let me set this up for you a bit further--the women, single and/or childless, were either friends of K from law school OR part of her & T's life in the local triathalon club. Enter WAHM of three...which one of these things is not like the other? The natural question of the friends as I was introduced as an "old" friend of the groom was "So, are you part of the tri-club?" I'm standing there in my $3 Kmart dress with my $12 Kohl's sparkly flip flops with my thighs rubbing together & arms that keep waving even after I stopped moving my arm & I laugh OUT LOUD. "ME? TRI-club? Only if by tri you mean my trio of trouble that I run around after all day, everyday. Or by tri you mean TRY to survive the day w/out an alcoholic drink before 5pm...No, this lady doesn't do tri club type of activities." I guess I should be flattered that they even asked, but I know better. I know they were just trying to make conversation. So, bless their hearts...enjoy the freedom you have to run 20 miles just because you want to, or ride your bike for 120 miles on a Sat afternoon because it's beautiful outside...I'll let you keep the triathalon skills to yourselves why I compete in the triathalon I call life!