Mean Mom

A few weeks ago I was driving with Jackie alone in the car.  She says, "A is my best friend.  And I know we'll be best friends for a long time because neither one of us gets to do things other kids do."

I asked her to give me an example.

She said, "Well, A said she didn't get to have a cell phone until she was 16.  I told her I knew what she meant, even though I know you said I couldn't have one until I'm like 20.  But also other things...she has to eat healthy foods.  Her parents make her go to bed early like we have to.  But I do feel bad for her about one thing.  She's NEVER EVER had soda!  She doesn't even get to have it on vacation at a restaurant!"

We talked about how that just means that her parents must love her a lot to want to make sure she only has good things in her body.  Yeah, Jackie understands as that is how her life is too.

It made me laugh at the time--but also smile.  And I DO hope these girls remain friends for a long time.  Especially since Jackie isn't allowed to date until she's 30!

This conversation immediately came to mind today when I was reading about The Mean Mom Challenge.  Basically it was an article talking about being a responsible parent is sometimes translated into being mean--I'll take it!  Here are 11Ways to be the Meanest Mom Around, taken from iMOM.com.

A mean mom…

1. Tries to get her kids to bed on time on school nights.
2. Limits the amount of caffeine, sugar and processed foods her children consume.
3. Limits the amount of time her kids spend watching TV, playing video games and surfing the net.
4. Is true to her word.  If she says, "You can't watch TV until your room is clean." then you can't watch TV until your room is clean.
5. Knows where her kids are at all times—including her teenagers.
6. Insists on knowing who her kids are hanging out with.
7. Demands that her children show respect to their teachers and other adults.
8. Expects her children to do their best.
9. Screens the movies and music her children want to see and hear. 
10. Disciplines her children, even when it breaks her heart.
11. Knows that being "mean" will benefit her children in the long run.

© 2010 iMOM. All Rights Reserved. Family First, All Pro Dad, iMOM, and Family Minute with Mark Merrill are registered trademarks.

I then asked each of my kids tonight if they thought I was a mean mom.

Jamison:  Yes. Sometimes.  But only when we be bad.

Josie:  NO! (She really wanted me to let her do something I didn't want her doing at the time...so I couldn't get a serious response from her.  Little turkey!)

Jackie:  No. (head tilt and smile) Well....sometimes.  When I don't pay attention or do what I'm supposed to.


The conversation continued with each of them as they agreed that even if I have to get grouchy, it's not because I don't love them.  It's simply because I care about their safety & health.  My kids are geniuses--of course they get it!

But I also plan to print & show them the Meanest Mom Pledge which will be hung in the house somewhere yet to be determined.  I'm not naive enough to believe that my kids will always understand my grouchy is for their own good.  We're not even in double digit ages yet...BUT, I vow to continue to stick to the rules.  And one day they'll thank me.  Right?